Yoon hi - Ye jo wolled hai na wolled..

Yes, world is spelt like that because I am quote Bunty and Babli from the movie Bunty Aur Babli. This is something that's used as a profound, deeply inspirational concept throughout. Let me quote this as best as I remember then I'll poke holes in it.

"Ye jo wolled hai na wolled, isme do tarah ke log hote hain, ek jo saari zindagi ek hi kaam karte rehte hain, aur doosre jo ek hi zindagi mein saare kaam kar lete hain. Ye main nahin wo dono kehte the, aur kehte kya they karte they..." This is Amitabh's voice.

But it's not true. These two didn't do everything in their lives, they did just one thing - they conned a lot of people. While conning and robbing people they did pretend  to be and do a lot of things, but as any actor knows pretending is not being. 


If you played the role of a doctor on screen would you become a doctor? Would you have any idea of what it's like to be buried in so many books that they weigh more than you? Would you know what it is like to work 36 hours non-stop with so much responsibility that you can't even think about taking a break? Would you know what it's like to be woken up in the middle of the night because someone is going around calling, "Is there a doctor in the house?"

If you played a cop would you suddenly transform into a cop. Would you know how it feels to be feared and respected at the same time? Would you know what it feels like to be on-duty 24 hours a day? Would you understand what happens when you get caught in a bank robbery and you are only one who has to be try and be a hero in front of automatic weapons simply because it'd look ludicrous of a cop was present and did nothing?

No, you would not!

Similarly, if you pretend to be someone in order to con people, it doesn't mean you are doing that job, you are doing only one job, yours, and that's stealing.

Well, it has no relevance and no connection to anything I am doing today, but things like this get under my skin and annoy me. :) And that's why I have this blog. ;) 

Hold the elevavator, please!

You know this feeling when you arrive at work, you have been walking fast from the station or bus stop to make it in time, you run up the steps, you go through doors like you are running a hurdle race, and you get to the elevatorbank and.....and you stop! After all the urgency and speed, you are obliged to cool your heels in that corridor after you press the lift button! What an anticlimax!

Happens to me every morning!

But not this morning!

As soon as I rounded the last corner I saw one lift ready to go up, the doors just closing. At the precise moment when I saw them the doors were about 50% closed. I covered the remaining distance in 2 swift steps and shoved my hand between the double doors that were now 75% closed and still closing. As soon as my arm passed through doors..the doors kept closing! 

Have you seen those Ninja movies where the Ninja takes out his long samurai sword and chops down in smooth, fluid motion? I did that...just without the sword and upwards instead of down. The doors, even though they were 90% closed now, arrested their progress and opened back! Phew, right?

As I entered the lift with the air of a world-champion Samurai, I realized to my horror that there was somebody in the lift! The closing doors had hidden this lady from my view who was a silent witness to my shenanighans with the lift doors with wide eyes! 

I took out my earphones and apologized, "I am sorry. I hope I didn't scare you." 

She started laughing, "No, no, it's ok. But you are very brave to push your arm in like that!" 

"Oh," I replied non-chalantly, "I know where the sensors are now."

You see, just last Friday one of my colleagues had told me where the sensors are between the lift doors, and by chopping upwards I had been able to intercept the beam and stop the doors closing. 

She started laughing. We had to ride a few floors together and I kept my embarassed silence, but she could not stop laughing. Actually now that I think back on it, I can't stop smiling either. This one will be my most embarassing lift moment for quite a while even though I have others. 

Have you ever done anything as silly as that?