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Friday, February 27, 2009

New Hindi Movie Review - Dostana

I review of a movie only if it was very good or very bad. This is the second type. 

The plot: 2 heterosexual guys pretending to be a gay couple in order to get 2 rooms in a flat because they love the flat so much. Well, it's a great flat. The 3rd occupant of the flat is the flat owner Neha, a beautiful, young, single girl! Of course. 

Review:
I guess it's supposed to be a romantic comedy, but romance is tacky and comedy is weak and most of the time disgusting. 

The star cast is fine, but none of them can act worth a damn, not in this movie. But that's mostly the fault of the direction and screenplay. The dialogues are a total washout, no originality, no color, no idiom, just plain, boring, simple like written by a schoolboy. 

The single msot thing I hate about weak Hindi movies is the lack of common sense and that's in abundance in this one. The emotional scenes are actually cringe-worthy, most of them. 

The way they have presented the whole thing I think it's offensive to gay and straight people alike. It's especially offensive to girls; in real life no girl can be fooled for so long by a man or men acting as gay and as poorly as these guys do. 

Music is okay as modern Hindi music goes, nothing special. No songs will survive more than 2 months. 

Priyanka Chopra is a gorgeous girl and they have presented her in a lot of lovely, sexy dresses. However, the picturisation has failed to show her as glamorous or desirable. 

I had decided to see it only because Shilpa Shetty was in it, but she's in as an item girl in the first song during credits. I think I will keep the song and throw away the movie. 

Conclusion: DON'T watch it!

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

The Finer Things in Life

"Sunny, you have no taste for the finer things in life!", she says. 

All because I wouldn't go to the bloody opera with her. 

And that brings up a very interesting question - what are the finer things in life and who decides? 

As always I am going to pose the questions and leave you holding the bag for answers. 

  • Why is wine tasting a finer thing while drinking beer while watching sports is uncouth? 

  • Why is watching a boring, insomnia-curing opera is finer but watching a 2-hour rollercoaster of action and suspense with Messers Stallone and Schwarzenegger is not? 

  • Why is reading mind-numbing, brain-killing fat-ass classics is a finer thing even though they were not written for today's life, but reading an interesting, action-packed thriller is junk? 

Well, the answer to who decides is simple - the society! How is it decided? I may not have the definitive answer but I have some theories. 

  • Anything that's so expensive that only an elite group of people can do it, is a finer thing in life. Case in point - Theatre vs. Movies, Wine vs. Beer. 

  • Anything that's so mind-numblingly boring that doctors can prescribe it in place of sedative is a finer thing. Case in point - opera. 

  • Anything that's fun and enjoyable is eithe forbidden or dirty or both. Case in point - sex. 

  • Anything that's cheap and easy to obtain is junk. Case in point - Burgers and Pizza. 

You know the finer things in my life? 

Any moment when I can enjoy the music (any kind of music) and move to it, with or without a pretty girl for a partner. (I am no dancer but I believe in the old adage from Bali island "If a man is happy, he can always learn to dance.") 

Any stupid, silly comedy show that makes me clap and burst into laughter. 

A smile that comes to my lips after I finish a nice meal that I cooked for myself. 

An evening with friends where they are being just as silly as I am (or usually beating me at it) and it doesn't matter what the silliness was wrapped around, a game of pool, a movie or a dance class. 

A parcel that brings me a new book. Read or unread. 

...actually, I have a few thousand more but they all have one thing in common, I don't give a hoot if they are the official "finer" things or not. My life, my rules! [Hmmm, not a bad title for my autobiography! ;) ]